These notes are inspired by the book The Sorcerer’s Apprentice by Evald Flisar.
Just to be clear, all my posts, categorised as “thoughts” and “books” are a mixture of the book review and my own opinions and experience. Same goes for both parts of this post.
“The fool who persists in his folly will become wise.” – William Blake
The main character – the author is trying to find himslef, his purpose throughout the developments. What he finds is far more complex and may even help the reader in finding his purpose, or maybe just some answers, along with the story.
When going through a change there is no bargaining and the prices are very high. One has to put it all in the open and there is no guarantee one won’t lose it all. The thing is that even in the worst case, what we lose is only the excess, the weed. Once we realize this, we no longer fear loss, thus we are half way to victory. We may sometimes find it very hard to let go of our ideas, desires, relationships and goals. But the thing in letting go is not in terminating all the mentioned things but in understanding that we cannot keep it all forever. Things, relationships, people change, also our desires and goals change. So it’s not really letting go of it all but just knowing they probably won’t stay in their current shape for ever. When realizing this, I dare say we are liberated in some way.
Once on the path, have no expectations, there may be evil, there may be good. Anything and everything may happen, but that’s not important. What matters is, we’re on our way. The means we get to a particular point doesn’t matter. The important thing is to know what we’re doing and why we’re doing it, to be present.
The society instilles us with the belief that we are what we think we are, an illusion we think is a reality. Once we awake from this illusion, we are free. It’s a world of definitions and catergories. A rock is always a rock be it in the sun or in the rain. But we are sometimes – most of the time – just a reflection of this world and not really ourselves. Someone may try to to touch our soul but will only be chasing air. Why don’t we stop all this and just be, feel the air, hear the wind? The power of the body is limited, strength of spirit is endless.
The difference between our wild and cultivated selves is that the wild self lives in the core and the cultivated one lives on the outskirts of our being. This is also the difference between animals and humas – animals live in their core, whilst humans, with a few exceptions, live on the outskirts and seldom even see or feel the core. By core I mean – what we really are, nothing more and nothing less.
Be a container without a bottom, knock it out, drop the seriousness, laugh. Laugh until we have the day we want to have. Despair, tiredness and despondency don’t like that – when we laugh, they go far away. The best moment for it is NOW, not tomorrow or the day after. Now. Start by smiling, proceed to laughing.
It’s easy being a hero behind the wall. But when we say »I know« instead of »I think« that’s when we step out in the open, we can lose our heads but only now are we taking action. What I’m talking about here is – it’s easy to only have a feeling, an opinion, a thought about something. But this is just keeping a safe distance between ourselves and the developments, between ourselves and the world. This way we can blame all these feelings and thoughts for our mistakes, as it seems to us, we weren’t the center of the developments anyway. Like Ivan Locke in the film Locke (played by the amazing Tom Hardy), he makes a decision and goes for it, stops at no obstacles and out comes a new man. He doesn’t take the safe way, he takes the right way. Which doesn’t necessarily mean it’s unsafe. We must all remeber this.
The nature has given us a mobile residence and enabled us to maintain it on a level of maximum efficiency. This way the nature is with us constantly. It heals us, it digests, it excretes, basically, this residence is a machine. So let’s not mock it and take it for granted. Be grateful for it and express gratitude to our bodies every moment of every day. There’s also a good consequence when we do this – we feel (or start to feel) very good and we look accordingly.
Once we realize and admit to ourselves that we are all just suckers, life becomes so much more clear and even easier. When we realize that everything we do, no matter how hard we try, we are all just walking, making step by step. Sometimes running, sometimes escalating, but still only making one step at a time because there is no other way. Then we start to breathe much easier. At least that’s the basic truth I’ve learned throughout life and a lot of literature. I would like to hear your opinions if you think otherwise or if you agree. Let’s debate.
To get back to the topic of this paragraph; once we lay off our phylosophy, we are simply human, just trying to become better at whatever we are doing. Once we accept our weaknesses, these no longer present obstacles and in fact become stepping stones, parts of our paths. This is all that is in our power – to create conditions in which we blossom! We can and have to create conditions in which the things pretty much get done on their own. The concentration is within us, not somewhere outside. Inner peace – once we own it, there are no expectations and momentarilly desires to disturb us. In the moment we are doing something, that thing is the sole goal of our life, so we are already here and now, standing right in the center of our goal.
We are free as long as we are bare and not wrapped in our conception of ourselves, this way there is nothing to defend, nothing to play. Since there is no desire to win and no fear of failure pulling us back. We always win even if it may sometimes seem otherwise to the rest of the world.
Embrace life and expect nothing.
Stay motivated, BSL